Megalongcat | Design in the Presence of Idiocy. -

So something happened in Twitter the other day that gave me a good chuckle. I sent out a question posed as such:

 
I expected that with all of the people on twitter, especially since the fact that the majority of the people on my list are tech-heads/geeks/designers/programmers that someone w
ould have either had experience with the HTC Diamond / Touch Pro or would at least have been able to point me in the right direction. Yet the only reponse I was met with was:

The rest of the dialogue afterwards is irrelevant, but it got me thinking. “Fred you sexy beast, why don’t you want a trendy iPhone?”. So let’s talk about why as a designer I make a conscious, ethical, and well informed decision to back my reasoning behind why I refuse to get Apple’s smartphone.

Note: I have nothing against Apple products, I think Mac computer’s are wonderful for graphic design work and movie editing. I prefer PC’s for 3d animation, programming, gaming, & personal customization. Both products have their specific uses. The product isn’t the issue here, it’s the brand.

1. Androgynous.

I’m a man. Despite the mockery I’ve made of hipsters and designers alike with my avatar photo I don’t wear tight skinny jeans, have real thick rimmed black glasses and I hate my coffee black and above $1. The iPhone’s smooth, slick, and minimalistic design is completely devoid of being associated with either gender. Despite it’s rounded edges it doesn’t cater towards the female market nor does large viewing screen it’s abundance of technology/applications cater towards the technical male crowd. The iPhone successfully breaks down gender barriers and is in essence a phone for men and women alike between the ages of 17 and 35. This is excellent since it’s exactly what Apple wanted. But I want a phone that looks like a man. You might think of this as chaunvistic, egotistical, etc but I disagree; I want a phone that doesn’t associate me with people wearing androgynous American Apparel clothing or movement restricting clothing.

2. The White Hand of God.

I don’t take anything personally, you could call me any racial epithet you wanted and I wouldn’t even bat an eyelash, I probably even have more racial jokes about my ethnic background than anyone on the planet. With that said, let’s talk about Apple’s White Hand of God.  Below is one of the apple backed advertisement’s for the iPhone:

I only need one picture to point something out.  If you go back and look at all of Apple’s advertising for it’s product’s you’ll notice they employ the white hand of god as their central motif when releasing new products.  You’re probably quick to call bullshit; to which I would suggest you stop freelancing, take a course on signage/semotics/advertisements/sociology and then take another look at their advertising methods.  Even so, this isn’t what bother’s me.  It’s the fact that Apple had the nerve when coming under fire for not advertising to other ethniticies to use this ad:

They even had the nerve to use this slogan with it “A little video for everyone.” (2007) used to market the third generation iPod nano”(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Apple_Inc._slogans)

When did Apple get this smug with their branding and advertising methods?  I swore on that day that the iPod would never enter my household.  I mean really, the “White Hand of God” offering “A little video for everyone” and using the black ipod nano?  If you think I’m stretching it, I once again point you towards graduate level courses in semoitics.  Apple has an amazing marketing team, they completely understand what they did.  I know they don’t have racist intentions, but they’re distinctly not marketing to me and as such I will not endorse their iPods and iPhones. (Computers are a different story, I need them to edit in Final Cut).

3. Steve Job’s War on Buttons.

My last reason is more of an awkward quirk.  This whole thing about no button’s that Apple has is compltely beyond me.  There’s a reason keyboards have buttons that make noises, there’s a reason that cell phones have buttons that make noises.  It’s completely uncessary but phone designers go OUT OF THEIR WAY to make sure that when you hit a button it makes a noise.  Why?!  It’s because people like to know they’re doing something.  The act of pushing a button and hearing a noise means that their physical action caused a reaction.  And though it might seem simple and illogical that something like this is necessary, quickly remind yourself that human beings are by nature slightly illogical.  I like buttons.  Maybe it’s just because I grew up in the gamer’s generation.

As a final note: Don’t be a flame troll. =]